Friday, January 11, 2013

A Big F-U to The Sickies.

You know what sucks? Winter sucks. 

When you have kids, winter is synonymous with sick and as much as you may want to hole you and your kids up for the months between October and April, groceries need to be bought, errands need to be run and thus starts the vicious cycle of The Sickies. 

Part of me wants to call a big ol' bullshit on the "breastfed babies get sick less" rule. Either that or I must have the world's sissiest antibodies. Hardly a solid has graced Maclane's lips and the kid has had strep, two ear infections and a handful of colds already this winter season. Granted, I understand that living with a walking germ factory toddler also tends to complicate things but can't a mom catch a break? 

I've sucked more snot from noses, taken more temperatures and sang more lame Wee Sing songs in an attempt to get my kids to open their mouths for medicine than I care to admit. And it's only January. 

Just the other night I swear I was reliving an excerpt from the movie The Exorcist. I know you know what I'm about to say. Had I just grabbed Mac from his crib and taken two steps into our carpeted, mind you, master bedroom before I swear I saw his head spin. At 3am in the morning he was able to projectile vomit not only all over me but also the carpet in front of our dresser as well as the accordion shades on our windows. The shades. On the windows. 

Talk about going for distance. 

And that wasn't even the worst vomit episode we had encountered that week. A mere few days before that while trying to cajole Carter into taking his antibiotic, I must have cajoled just a little bit too hard because as soon as it touched his lips, he gagged and vomited fish stick all over the couch. 

A word to the wise? If you ever plan on having children? Stick with leather. I'm not quite sure there is anything worse than day old fish stick vomit, let alone two week old, mercilessly-cleaned-with-the-spot-bot fish stick vomit. 

As for the spot bot? You know when you're breaking that baby out at 3am on a weeknight it should have been named the "Oh Shit Bot." 

Is it too late to craft my family a little bubble to live in?

14 comments :

  1. I'd like to join you in that bubble. Every single time my kids puke it's while they're facing me and I have to catch it WITH MY HANDS! I think I'm going to start bathing us all in bleach

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  2. If you figure out the bubble...let me know. I'd pay big bucks!

    I hope this weekend is germ free and restfull!

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  3. I also call BS on breasfed babies get less sick. My first had ear infection after ear infection and ended up with two sets of tubes. A Nurse practitioner told me once that breastfed babies get less sick because they are more likely to have SAHM and don't go to day care.

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  4. Oh my - I'd be building a bubble to! I thought babies under 1 weren't even that likely to get strep! Hopefully you'll avoid any more sickies this winter!

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  5. I have friends with babies breastfed almost all the way to 2 years old that are sick virtually all the time. I really think it's just the way we're born. I personally believe in the Germ Theory...at least that's what I tell myself. It's nice to be able to credit my sub-par housekeeping with my daughter's stellar health so far...

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  6. It's true.. Not all BF'ed kids get sick less.. Especially those that have big bros/sis'. I'll be thinking of you and your little guys.. Winter SUCKS but vomit SUCKS even more!

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  7. Oh my goodness! I'll take the leather comment into account...yikes! Hoping it all gets better for you!

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  8. I'm so sorry y'all are having to deal with this! We just got over it...and I can't remember the last time we were sick. The germs this winter are vicious. Also? We are looking hard core for a leather couch. Light tan suede? Were we stupid?!

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  9. I'm sorry, but this totally made me laugh, especially the part about the couch. Agreed with the breastfeeding thing not getting babies sick, my little man caught his first cold at a week old.

    Hoping the kids get better soon.

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  10. Everyone's sick! It's awful. The virus has been lingering with us here since the day after Christmas. Thankfully, I do believe breastfeeding really helps the immune system because my toddler rarely gets sick (I only breastfed him till 6 months but that immune system is strong!) and my littlest has not had so much as a cold since he was born. *fingers crossed it stays that way for awhile*

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  11. Ohhhhh Gaaaawd! Fish stick vomit!!!!?????

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  12. I agree on the breastfed babies don't get sick BS! LIES!

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  13. omg totally need a leather couch. I've resorted to covering mine with like 16 blankets and towels bc of all the vomit in our house. and just when the vomit ended it looks like P is picking up some nasty bug that is full of snot, sore throats, nasty cough and a fever. Yay January? (UGH!)
    Hope you guys all get better asap. This season sucks.

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