Dear Fellow Schuykill Interstate Drivers,
That misting precipitation you see falling from the sky? That's called rain. Now, unless you've been living in either the Sahara Desert or the Tundra for the last, oh I don't know, one hundred years, I know this isn't the first time you've experienced a drizzle. Contrary to popular belief, neither you nor your vehicle will melt once in contact with said drizzle. I know! Sounds crazy, but believe me. I only speak the truth.
And just because there's this little stretch of highway, less than a mile long, might I add, that is often referred to as "The Conshohocken Curve," it does not mean that you need to adjust your speed from the regulated 55 mph to a mere crawl, just so that you can navigate a slight bend in the road. This is how accidents happen, people!
In closing, all I ask is that you please, stop driving like complete and total morons.