Saturday, May 2, 2009

Dear Anonymous Commentor.

In response to my last post regarding the must-read "The Middle Place" by Kelly Corrigan, an Anonymous commentor left me this priceless little paragraph:

" As uncomfortable and angsty as they might be,
the middle place years are your true salad days.

"salad days, / When I was green in judgment, cold in blood."
-Wm Shakespeare, Antony & Cleopatra

Most often "salad days" refers to the time of youth after high
school or college before you marry. But for those of us who
have met our lifemates, the days before children are true
salad days. With more money and time at your disposal,
vacations and lazy days at home, long nights together with no
fear of interruption are the days you will look back on in the future.
They will sustain you through life's challenges and help renew
your love when you think all is lost. "


Dear Anonymous Commentor,

A true and deep heartfelt thank you goes out to you. You do not know the depth to which your words touched me and how those words have moved and reassured me. This "middle place" holds many unknowns, for both a young wife and a young woman. Unknowns filled with both fear and hope. It thrills me and excites me to continue filling these days sans children with those lazy days and long nights you speak of. I know the future holds many things for us; challenges as well as celebrations. I cannot wait to spend, and promise to spend these "days" strengthing the foundation between myself and my husband for the benefit of our future. I've thought about these words a lot today and I'm sure will continue to think about them in the future. It sounds like you've had some experience. Thank you. Thank you for answering those silent questions of a woman and a wife, stuck happily in that middle place.

3 comments :

  1. I completely agree that the years when you are first married, before you have children are some of the most wonerful ones you will have. It was important for my husband and I to be married a few years before babies to really strengthen our relationship together, just the two of us. Otherwise, if you have children too quickly, you will never really know the person and will be lost with each other once your kids move out. Enjoy this special time and sleep in a LOT together:)

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  2. What an awesome comment! Those words are a perfect description of the first years of marriage. I've been in my "middle place," and I am still loving it after five years. Like Mandy said, I feel like this time before kids is so important for us to develop our relationship.

    I just stumbled upon your blog - love it so far!

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  3. I, too, am in that middle place where I'm married, pay bills, work full-time, but don't have kids and don't really feel like a full-fledged adult. I struggle with this limbo that I'm in. I feel like I need my parents a lot more than I thought a late 20-something should (for support and advice, not financially). I struggle with knowing when the time is "right" to have kids (I just don't feel it yet and sometimes feel guilty for not).

    To think of this time as my "salad days" makes it a positive limbo. So true. Thank you, Anonymous Blogger, for sharing your words of wisdom. They touched my heart too. I will be more secure in my middle place and enjoy this time more after reading their words.

    And I will totally have to find that book!

    PS - Love that you guys built Cornhole! I love, love, love that game!

    ReplyDelete

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