Thursday, May 31, 2012

5 Things I Plan To Do Differently This Time Around.

For what it's worth, Motherhood is just as I expected it to be. Messy, incredible, chaotic, fulfilling, frustrating, endearing. The greatest and hardest full-time "job" I've ever had. Days complete with the highest of the highs and the lowest of the lows.


You see, I've learned a ton during my inaugural 22 months of motherhood and I'll be the first to admit that most days? I still don't have it all together. That aside, there are certainly some things I'll be doing differently the second time around.

Here are just a few of them:



1. M2 and I will not be "rooming in" together every single night while in the hospital. I have no doubts that I'll love this new baby immensely and want to spend every waking moment with him- but I'm no fool this time. My four day hospital stay will be the closest thing to a vacation that I'll get all year- I'm going to want to sleep while the sleeping is good. 


2. I have no lofty goals for breastfeeding. I made it nearly four months with Carter and if it works this time around? Swell. If it doesn't, I'm not afraid of the F-word although between diapers for two AND formula? We may as well go broke. Scratch the dramatics. I may just have to give up my tri-weekly manicures. 


3. M2 will be sleeping in his crib much earlier than his Big Brother. In fact, Carter didn't start sleeping in his crib until he was almost five months old. No dice, M2. You have three months and then we're shipping you down the hall to the expensive nursery I insisted on decorating again.


4. Babywear. Babywear. Babywear. In something other than the damn Houdini-Moby. 


5. And lastly, interview babysitters and get out of the damn house more than three childless times in a year. 


Mark my words, Loyals. Things will be different. Right? RIGHT?




33 comments :

  1. Oh I don't even want to think of all the things is do differently the second go around!

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  2. I couldn't agree more with having M2 sleep in the nursery while your there! Sydney started in the nursery, but ended up in the room with me a couple of nights from needing to eat so much.

    I have decided that when we have another child, they will be in their own room earlier as well! Sydney slept in our room/bed way too long! lol

    There is nothing wrong with Formula if you need to do it. I couldn't breastfeed Sydney for more than a month and she turned out fine on it. :-)

    I love this post! You always have such a way with words! I can't wait to see M2 and am so excited for you!

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  3. I think all those sound great! You are a fabulous mama!

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  4. Yes, they will! I'm amazed at how much easier it is to leave Callan for date night. Not because I don't love him, just because I know I was scared for no reason with Coop! I wore Cal around all the time for the first few months. It's the only was to get anything done.

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  5. We soooo got babysitters (outside of family) when Nick was 7 months old..and now...we're at the point where we have them at least twice a month! Start early..if you can! We have great sitters too...I trust them completely w/ the kids and they are good girls themselves!

    Yes...things are always different the second time around. You'll find that you are less rigid and on edge about things like you may have been w/ the first (ex...when baby 2 starts sneezing...you'll wait to take them to the dr if it hasn't gone away after a week, where w/ the first you would have made an appointment after the first sniffle).

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  6. If you dont have a baby carrier I highly recommend the Ergo

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  7. Oh I also took advantage of the nursery when we where int he hospital...worth it. Its crazy how when you have a second child that you learn no not be as crazy lol!! No matter what you are an amazing mother

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  8. I like the last one the best. Getting out of the house is a MUST. And making time for 'the husby' is a MUST MUST! It's good for the soul!

    Can't wait!!!!!!!

    xoxoxo

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  9. I was so afraid that they would bring me back the wrong baby or put a tracking device from the government in my babies, that all 3 roomed with me. And I don't think I would have been able to sleep not having them in the room with me anyways. I'm a control freak like that. Which is also why I didn't get an epidural! Ha! I was only in the hospital for 2 nights with my first and my 2nd, and just ONE night with my last!

    Breastfeeding is hard work. And as long as your baby is being fed, then who cares what they get. BUT like you said, diapers for 2 and formula is going to be expensive. That was MY #1 reason for sticking with breastfeeding for as long as I could.

    I have a 13 year old daughter who needs money, I will ship her to your house for the summer :-)

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  10. I'm sure I will have a similar list and I LOVED my K'Tan!

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  11. It's great to have goals like that, Ashley! It's amazing what we learn the first time around and how "second child syndrome" already sets in when we're pregnant...at least for me anyway! The only thing I'm going to change this time around, not to put myself on a pedestal, is to use cloth diapers from day #1 and give babywearing a try. I hated it with Braden, he didn't mind it...but my mind set was "I just WORE you on the inside for almost 10 months, why would I want to wear you on the outside now too!?" I'm so excited for the arrival of M2! And you are SO SMART to want to sleep in the hospital. I was discharged in 26 hours with Braden, as my decision...and I honestly don't know what I'll do this time, if I'll want to stay or jet out of there as fast as I can again!

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  12. I had no shame telling the nurses to keep Colson in the nursery at night...because you're right, it was like a vacation! It was nice to not have to fight keeping my eyes open during the day because I had actually gotten some sleep the previous night!

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  13. Love you blog- new follower! Im 26 weeks pregnant with my first and you have some great advice!:) Love it

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  14. Our second is due in September and let me tell you- I am COMPLETELY with you on these things...especially keeping baby #2 in the nursery at the hospital. What were we thinking last time?!

    Oh the things we know this time around as not-so-first time mommas!

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  15. My little one is nearly four months old and I'm about to stick him in his nursery. Stick to your guns momma. ;)

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  16. Oh my gosh - so many of these ring true for me. I think I will put #2 in the crib right away just to avoid the drama. Thatcher was in our room until 5 months as well.

    And, I think with #2 in the picture that getting out is even MORE important than before ... we do this quite a bit (I couldn't even count how many times, but at least twice a month) ... and I think it's really healthy and important. Especially if you want things to pick back up in the bedroom, per yesterday's post - ha ha!

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  17. I agree with all of these! I tried babywearing with Ci and failed! One of my best friends is a babywearing group and promises to help me figure out those damn things this time around.

    Also, I agree with you with having M2 sleep in the nursery. I don't even know if that's an option for us at the hospital we are delivering at. I think all babies sleep in the room with their parents.

    Good luck, Carter is a great toddler and I need M2 will be as well!

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  18. I guess I'm a horrible mother lol! P only stayed in our room for 6weeks and breast feeding for 9weeks (just didn't produce enough). And we made it back to the social scene with friends at 4months old and try to go out a couple times another sans toddle to this day.

    All of these things seem reasonable and will hopefully make life with two a smoother transition!! Good luck an I can't wait to see M2 when he's born!

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  19. I think it's fun to see these-what different moms would change the second time around. I, too have thought about this and it's interesting, some of mine are the opposite of yours! But that's okay, we learn what we like, right? :)

    For me, I nursed for 6 months. I hit my max. But the week I stopped nursing, my daughter started getting sick every other week (she's in daycare). So, I think I'll actually try to go longer this time. It will save me some heartache and days off work with a sick baby!

    best wishes!
    xo
    -W.

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  20. Babywearing- the Ergo is awesome!! Definitely worth the splurge. We loved our Moby too (once we figured it out) soory for the unsolicited advice!
    Lexi still doesnt sleep in her crib so I agree about things going differently next time.

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  21. I hated the Moby wrap. Never could figure that damn thing out!

    And I laughed about your "f word" comment. One of the lactation consultants (aka nipple nazis) made a reference to my husband that when I said the f word (formula) to not let me use it. Little did she know we were already supplementing because I was so afraid my baby wasnt getting enough!

    The second time around was easier. You dont feel like such a rookie :)

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  22. Love this post AP! The second time around will be tough enough with your darling albeit energetic Toddler running around!

    And I completely agree with all of your points. I didn't room in with Rhys and felt kind of guilty. But you will need that blissful sleep without 8-9 lbs of baby boy on your hips. And I would love if your breastfeeding can at least give you some relief (and some mani/pedis!) before you have to switch to formula, but C turned out great so no pressure!

    Bless you and M2! Can't wait to meet him!!

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  23. Yes, get your rest while you can those first few nights! I did not have Tommy in my room, but did have them bring him in to be fed, which was exhausting. And I was the same as you on the nursing - I made it 4 months til I went back to work, but it's what works for you, whether a SAHM or working mom. And FYI, we are done with the diapers officially, but there is always something that comes along to take it's place to spend the money on...I just signed Tommy up for an "Amazing Athletes" class at his daycare that is about $7 less a month than what we were shelling out for diapers!

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  24. I think those are great goals. I mean the great thing of M2 being #2 is that you've done it all before so you know what does work and what doesn't. :)

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  25. You used to be an oncology nurse right? Did you have training for the hospital nursery at all? I'm so curious what it is like in there. When we toured the hospital there was like one baby getting a bath back in the corner or something. I'm such a paranoid control freak I worry they would ignore my baby or something. I'm sure there are super sweet bored nurses just hoping for a baby to love on.

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  26. How sad is it that I kinda wish we were having another baby just for the hospital stay. That quiet time was awesome!

    Formula is awesome with second babies {though the price hurts a lot}

    And you are more rockstar than me...my girls went into their nurseries from day one!

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  27. Love this post! My son has been in his crib since day one and has never ever had an ounce of breast milk- and he's perfect! And we used an Ergo- worked really well. Whatever works for your family is best- remember that!

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  28. With baby #1 I couldn't wait to leave the hospital: bring her home, show her the nursery, etc. With baby #2 I thought they were going to have to drag me out kicking & screaming. I felt like I was at the Ritz. I hadn't been that pampered in forever. My hospital even did a massage the day after.....that really made me never want to leave.

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  29. I strongly support the babysitter and no sleeping in your hospital room thing. I think that this is something I see a lot of moms do to their discredit. So rock on AP!

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  30. Babysitters......oh how I wish I could trust people lol. And yeah baby wear, Yes. Sleep, Yes. no bf guilt, YES YES YES.

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  31. Good call on the sitter! My parents & in laws have never turned down a chance to babysit but gahhh the guilt sometimes! I would feel way more ok being out all hours if the person watching were getting paid & not doing it out of love

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  32. am I the worst mom ever for putting Eme in the nursery and she was my first baby? ha. Oops ;) In all honesty, my friend is an l&d nurse and she basically insisted they take her. So I didn't fight them. It was heavenly. Plus, they only take them from like 11pm-5am so it's not THAT long in actuality--but enough to get some shut eye? For sure. Also was going to ask you-will M stay home with C overnight? We think we're gonna have Declan do this so I'll be alone at nights in the hospital which really sounds kind of awful but also I don't want to disturb Eme's normalness too much by having her go to my parents. Sigh. It's gonna be different this time, that's for sure.

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  33. Those are all great things to do the second time around----especially getting out of the house! It's the ONLY way you will stay sane:):) Enjoy the last couple weeks of pregnancy, you are almost there!!!!

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