Wednesday, February 1, 2012

Don't Be Fooled. I Hardly Have It All Together...

On occasion, I will receive an email from a reader that asks, "How do you do it?" And upon reading, I can’t help but ask, “Do what? This?” As I casually glance around, admiring my ramshackle kitchen, remnants of the last meal fed to The Toddler caked on the pantry door and floor beneath the high chair and approximately 472 toys strewn around the family room tornado-style. I could easily explain how that happens. In fact, it could be summed up in one word: Motherhood.

The email so sweetly goes on to commend my baking ability, mad craft skills and talent required to do all things daily while managing not to lose The Crazy Toddler Wildebeest. Which, Loyals, I fear is something that may happen any day now. In fact, I’ve taken to locking all exterior doors because a certain Someone has singlehandedly developed a knack for turning doorknobs.

The email further commends my "natural," (excuse me while I scoff at the word, Scoff Scoff!), capacity for appearing as if I “do it all” while wearing freshly hot-rolled hair and hot skinny jeans.

Am I writing the same blog that you all are reading? You guys crack me up.

I am here to tell you, sweet Loyals, this is so not the case. I hardly have it all together and most days? I’m lucky to change out of my standard mom-i-form of black sweats and long-sleeved maternity T.

Most days? I pacify The Toddler with a banana and a movie on the iPad while confined to the Pack and Play so that I can sneak in an extra 45 minutes of sleep at the ungodly hour of 7 in the morning. I only begin to peel myself from the sheets as The Toddler begins throwing one leg over the side of the Toddler Prison in a kamikaze-style attempt at a breakout.

On the days I bake something? It usually means I plan on presenting that to The Husband as an excuse as to why I haven’t prepared dinner that evening.

Oh and crafting? I have no idea where and when I got bit by that bug. But on the days that The Toddler doesn’t nap and I find myself just one Cheeto shy of locking myself in the bathroom? I pull out a wreath or some card stock and count to 100 all while precariously handling a glue gun and trying to keep The Toddler from stashing party napkins and styrofoam plates down the heat register.

I do try to maintain a happy, well-adjusted household. Does it happen every day? Oh, heck no. Thankfully I am married to a man who doesn’t necessarily mind seeing my hair tied up in the same mom-knot every day. Or if he does, he at least knows better than to say something about it.

I will admit to squeezing in at the very least a shower just minutes before The Husband walks through the door so that he doesn’t oft mistake a slight odor that emanates from my personal space for one of The Toddler’s dirty dipes.

The Husband is truly a domestic saint of a partner. We share your typical household chores and while I do attempt accomplishing one Household Task per day, such as mopping/dusting/vacuuming or the utmost achievement of not only washing a load of laundry but drying, folding and putting it away too, (ohmygod, does that really ever happen?) whatever is not done during the week is gladly tackled together on the weekend.

So dear Loyals, please do not be fooled. I do not have it all together. In fact, I hardly do. 

But? I kind of pride myself on making a mess at the end of the day. It means we lived. It means I got down on the floor and played with Carter and eventually got sidetracked as we moved onto a messy mealtime or wandered down to the playroom, our favorite room in the house to mess up. Sure, it also means that C probably watched Madagascar for the 700th time while I wrote this post, but shortly after? We ran around outside instead of going to the grocery store to pick up fixings for dinner. 

Another night of leftovers it is.. So like the saying goes, "I may not have it all together, but together? We certainly have it all." 

Happy Wednesday and Happy February, Loyals!



26 comments :

  1. What a great post! Sometimes it's easy to think that you're the only one who doesn't have time to put the laundry away and before you know it all the clothes that were folded in the basket have been worn and are now in the dirty basket all over again, or you're the only Mom who stays in sweats 90% of the time when you're home, doesn't always have dinner cooked etc. But, your kids are happy, husbands happy and you have a fulfilled feeling at the end of the day when your toddler passes out at bedtime because of the hours you spent playing with them. At the end of the day, that's what matters.

    ~Laura

    ps...love Carter's outfit!!!

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  2. This is true real talk. I love it. My favorite part? "It means we LIVED". Great post!!

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  3. What a sweet post! I love it! I can only hope I am this way when I become a mom.

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  4. Love this post and I of course love your blatant honesty. It makes other moms feel more normal. And you are so right, when you look around and notice the mess it means you had a blast that day which is what you are supposed to do. So girl keep messing it up :)

    BTW love the button :)

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  5. What an awesome post! As I begin to tackle mommy hood I am quickly learning that I would rather not have it all together than to not spend time with my sweet girl (also an AP!)

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  6. Love this post! As I am just a mere 6 weeks in to my new job as mommy I am quickly learning that I would rather not have it all together if it means more time and fun with my sweet girl-who I might add is AP herself!

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  7. Loved this post so much!! You are hysterical with your "toddler prison". But you do sound like one lucky lady. I hope to stay home with my children one day.

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  8. Great post! No one has it all together and if they tell you they do, they're crazy! All we can do is our best and I think you're doing a pretty damn good job :)

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  9. Love this mama!! We may not have it all together, but together we have it all!! ;)

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  10. You don't have it all together? Really? :)

    Sweetest post (and a great reminder). Love.

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  11. Raising a toddler is a full-time job. All of that other stuff? There aren't enough hours in the day! You're doing a great job, and posts like these are what other mamas, like me, love to read! Because none of us are perfect, no matter how hard we may try to be... and that's okay! Love that toddler and ignore the pile of junk on the floor!

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  12. Yes and amen!

    If I showed people how I look in my glasses with dirty hair and un-brushed teeth whilst I blog? During which time Kitty is sticking the end of my headphones into the wall socket (HOW DID I NOT PLUG THAT ONE UP???)? And did I really just sit in a glob of lentils and...sniff, sniff...applesauce? Well, that just doesn't sound like something anyone would care to read :)

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  13. Girl! This is wonderful. My favorite is the last part where you say you got down in the floor and played. who cares about the mess. that's whats really important. because, you're raising a fine young boy and he's going to have memories of his mom playing with him and loving on him. he's not going to care if he grew up in a house that's tidy. he will not care one bit. but, he'll always be able to say that he has the best mom ever- the fun mom- the mom that played with him. and really...isn't that what children are all about!

    love this ashley!

    great reminder for me to do the same!!!!!

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  14. What?! You have toys on the floor and laundry not put away?! The horror!

    HA! Glad to know you're just like the rest of us :)

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  15. Great post! I love to know I'm not the only one that puts the little dude in the pack n play in the morning for even just "10 more minutes!" of sleep. With him still getting up most nights I feel no shame. Because like you said we take time to play and LIVE.

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  16. So true and I think all moms can relate. Love your honesty and it sounds like your husband understands and appreciates what you do all day whether it is cooking a meal or making sure his boy gets plenty of attention! By the way, that outfit on C is adorable--where from?

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  17. Wow. I guess we can't be friends anymore. Because my house? Always perfect. My hair? Always done. My outfits? Always match.

    BA HA. HA. HA.

    Actually, in all honesty, I'm just lucky my husband hasn't traded me in yet.

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  18. You speak my mind. Except I'm pretty sure everyone already knows I don't have it all together ;)

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  19. This post made me laugh and tear up at the same time! Love your honesty. I feel the same way. My non mama friends espeically think I have it ALL together and I DO NOT. So--thanks for this--telling it like it is! xo

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  20. I recently read a blog (I wont say whose!) that mentioned that her husband made some crack that he works more than she does so she needed to lay off him. I CRINGED. Yay, for sweet helpful husbands! I couldnt be a SAHM without the support and help from my husband!

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  21. I loved this post. I've gotten singled out as someone who "has it all together" and it makes me laugh out loud. I may do my hair and makeup on the reg, but that just means there is laundry yet to be done and dishes in the sink. Some things can wait :)

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  22. LOVE this! Thanks for keeping it real.

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  23. It's hard to keep in mind that everyone CHOOOSES what to post on their blog - they post pictures of the house after it's clean, not while it has mashed banana on the floor and snot all over the couch pillows. That people talk about things that others are interested in reading about, like a list of items your toddler wants to eat, not the long list that they won't touch. Thanks for posting this :) It's good to know we're all humans

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