Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Sicky. Sick. Sick.

Shel Silverstien. What a genius. To this day, I can recall almost every single poem, word for word, written in his collection, Where the Sidewalk Ends. And to this day, his poems make me smile from ear to ear and yes, even laugh out loud. Hands down, one of my absolute favorites? I Cannot Go To School Today.

"I cannot go to school today"

Said little Peggy Ann McKay.

"I have the measles and the mumps,

A gash, a rash and purple bumps.
My mouth is wet, my throat is dry.

I'm going blind in my right eye.

My tonsils are as big as rocks,I've counted sixteen chicken pox.
And there's one more - that's seventeen,

And don't you think my face looks green?

My leg is cut, my eyes are blue,

It might be the instamatic flu.
I cough and sneeze and gasp and choke,

I'm sure that my left leg is broke.

My hip hurts when I move my chin,

My belly button's caving in.
My back is wrenched, my ankle's sprained,

My 'pendix pains each time it rains.

My toes are cold, my toes are numb,
I have a sliver in my thumb.
My neck is stiff, my voice is weak,

I hardly whisper when I speak.

My tongue is filling up my mouth,
I think my hair is falling out.
My elbow's bent, my spine ain't straight,

My temperature is one-o-eight.

My brain is shrunk, I cannot hear,
There's a hole inside my ear.
I have a hangnail, and my heart is ...

What? What's that?

What's that you say?

You say today is .............. Saturday?
G'bye, I'm going out to play!"

A printout of this poem sat taped to the glass medicine cabinet that hung on the wall of Nurse's Office in my grade school. You know, the medicine cabinet that held all of the important things, like cotton swabs, tongue depressers, lollipops and stickers. I used to stand in front of that cabinet and read this poem every time I found myself in front of the school nurse. Let's just say I was a regular. (Damn asthma). Well, today made me think of this poem. Why? Because today, I wish I could've gone to the school nurse.

I was lovingly and graciously sent home from work this morning.. but, but, but I woke up feeling fine!.. after breaking out into a cold and clammy sweat and staking claim on the floor of the nearest staff bathroom. Just imagine the most pathetic scene: kneeling on the gross, dirty floor of a hospital bathroom, covered with grody, stiff hospital blankets, clutching a useless, scratchy hospital pillow to my chest as I bargained with my upset tummy, "i will give you anything you want, if you please dont make me throw up!" Let's just say my upset tummy won that round. Blech.

I do want to say how much I love nurses though. Especially my co-workers. What other friends offer you anti-emetics and to stick an IV in your arm and hang IV fluids at the first sign of nausea and dehydration? They're truly the best friends to have, my friends. And I do have the most wonderful co-workers.

Who sent me home with a hopital pink throw-up basin. Which may or may not be sitting next to my bed.

Ugh.. If one of you could make the room stop spinning, that would be fabulous. I'm lucky I can type with my eyes half-closed. Ehhh...Talk about out of commission... Back to the fetal position...


  1. yuck, that's the worst! feel better soon!

  2. Feel better soon! I hate being sick!

  3. Oooh, I love Shel Silverstein! I had to recite his ice cream poem in 3rd grade, and I'm still a fan :-) Hope you feel better soon!

  4. Yuck! I hope you feel better soon! You are so lucky to have nurse friends!

  5. Aww, I hope you feel better soon lady!!

    I know what you mean about the nurses.. my mom is an ER nurse & just the person to have around when we were sick!

  6. I'm right there with you... hope you feel better soonish!!

    ps: LOVE Shel Silverstein. My fave poem was "Peanut Butter Sandwich" :)

  7. Shel Silverstein is the BEST. My sister and I used to read his book over and over again. Our favorite was Brother For Sale. I need to buy his books again. We've long since lost ours.

  8. That is terrible! hope you get to feeling better!!

  9. Poor Ashley! I hope you feel better!!

  10. Boo! Hope you are feeling better!


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