Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Vehicular Pigeon Slaughter with a Side of Emotional WellBeing.

i hit a pigeon on the way to work today.


Not any pigeon, mind you.
A pigeon who happened to be just hangin' out with two of his pigeon homies.
In the middle of a major road.
i can't help the fact the your homies were smart enough to FLY AWAY as my vehicle approached.

I rolled right over that poor Mr. Pigeon.
Flattened him into a pigeon pancake.

I've never run over a poor little defenseless creature before.

So, what do I do? I call Hubs.
Who's been spending the last few nights in bed
reading a book to help him better understand the female psyche (read: his crazy wife).
Last night's chapter was all about listening.

Me: Hubs, I ran over a pigeon! In my pretty new car!
Hubs: WHAT?!
Me: I thought he was going to fly away like his two pigeon friends!
Hubs: How do you feel about the pigeon?
Me: [laughing]
Hubs: [silence].. I'm listening.
Me: I squished him! I bet I have feathers sticking out of the grill!
Hubs: So, you're saying you squished the pigeon. How do you feel about squishing the pigeon?

if only you could hear the Psychiatrist tone to Hubs' voice. It was absolutely hysterical.
Way to put your new-found listening skills to good use, Hubs!
and yes, I did have feathers sticking out between the treatds of my front tire ...

14 comments :

  1. HAhaa, "how do you feel about the squished pigeon?" What kind of question is that. I was cracking up. Sorry about the bird, but funny post.

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  2. That is hysterical, hahahah xxxoo

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  3. Hahaha... I love that he's reading books like that! (Think he could convinve Z to? ;) )

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  4. Haha. RIP pigeon. Hilarious post.

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  5. Nice!! That is absolutely hilarious! I wish we could have heard him! I love what our poor husbands have to go through!!

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  6. what a perfect opportunity to put those listening skills to the test! hahahah, I would have been freaking out!

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  7. Too funny!
    Love the convo.
    Sorry to hear about the pigeon making a mess of your car ;)

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  8. "How do you FEEL about the squished pigeon?" PRICELESS.

    On Saturday I ran over a cat. A cat that I imagine was some little girl's very best friend in the whole wide world. Of course, I cried. Then I told Hubs, who commended me for not swerving to try to miss it (at 60 mph), because a dead cat is better than a dead wife.

    Men! :-P

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  9. Um, I need the title to that book asap lol. Funny post.

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  10. How do you feel about squiching the pigeon? At least he had his thinking cap on :)

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  11. Oh no oh no oh no. I'm sorry that this happened. Why didn't he fly away??

    And I am cracking up at your hubby! Seems like it made it better!

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