I've been peed on. I've been pooped on. I've been vomited on. And that was all before becoming a Mom. I used to be a nurse, remember? I've cleaned up spit-up and even caught it in my hands a time or two. I've sucked boogies and as of late, I've sucked a LOT of boogies. But one thing I haven't done? Is suck boogies with my mouth. Yes, you read that correctly and if you're not thoroughly grossed out, I'll explain how. And no, it's not nearly as bad as you're currently imagining. I promise.
I wrote here about how much I hated using the traditional boogie sucker. Now, clearly I'm aware that I could never, ever suck Carter's brains out through his nose, or somehow manage to suck up even just an eyeball, but despite those allayed fears, I still can't stand to stick that blue syringe bulb up Carter's little nosey.
I had seen a couple of alternative boogie suckers in stores and online, one of which was made by Graco and required batteries. I was all set to order this sucker, literally, off of Diapers(dot)com but after having read less than stellar reviews, I set out to find the sucker that received five stars. From nearly 33 mommy reviewers. And after a few clicks, Alleluia, I found it. The Nosefrida. Let me tell you, internet friends, 33 internet mommies do not lie.
Can we take a minute and talk about the Swedes? These geniuses invented the Nosefrida and if it wasn't for the fact that I'm sharing C's cold with him, I would kiss the inventor of the Nosefrida on the mouth. Maybe even sneak 'em some tongue. First the pacemaker, then the ultrasound and now the Nosefrida? These Swedes are on a freakin' roll!
I had all intents to photograph myself modeling the Nosefrida. But since we share everything in the M household, including this godforsaken cold, my nose resembles that of Rudolph (how festive!) and with all of you in mind, thought I might spare you that horrific picture.
See that red tip there? That ends goes in my mouth. See the other end there? The one that looks like a plastic test tube? That piece goes right up against C's nostril. Or his nare, if you're a medical nerd like me. Did you catch that? Absolutely nothing has to go UP my son's nose. Momma loves her some less invasive boogie-sucking.
More importantly, so does Carter. Humming the ABC's, because well, one can't really sing while trying to simultaneously suck boogies from their son's nose, and a few quick inhales later, the boogies are sucked and Carter is a happy little man.
You know, once you can get past the idea of using your mouth to suck boogies out of your son's nose.