Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Nursing Wear a La.... Houdini?


All those books I've been reading fail to mention how ridiculous nursing wear can be. I guess you can say I had a minor freakout when I realized that I'm due to be induced in t-minus two days and own nothing that resembles nursing wear. No nursing tanks. No nursing bras. No nursing gowns. No nursing anything.

Just as I'm about to take matters into my own crazy and hormonal hands, in steps my wonderful and fabulous Momma. Who basically pays far too much to overnight me a package full of straight jackets. Okay, I kid. She mailed me two surprisingly adorable and shockingly cute and classic-looking nursing tanks. However, I will admit it took me several minutes to figure out how to get them on.

They're not the simple kind with spaghetti straps. They're more the super cute wife-beater look with a layered "tank" beneath it. Well, fooled you guys! The "tank" really isn't a "tank" at all! It's just a built-in nursing bra!

With two holes.

An arm hole. And a boob hole.

What. The. F*&k. 

These things should come with instructions. Have you ever tried getting your arm out of the boob hole? While simultaneously trying to draw the tank up over your 9 and a half month preggo belly? Yeah. It's not easy.

Like I said, these things should come with instructions.

21 comments :

  1. HA HA HA! You crack me up! I sure hope you keep this blog going after you have sweet baby boy! Get yourself a Bravado nursing bra! They are the best! $50 each- get on amazon, they'll be here tomorrow- FREE SHIPPING! I'll send you the link from the sellers I bought mine from if you need it! THEY ARE THE BOMB!

    Praying for you and anxiously awaiting with you!

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  2. That was too funny! I haven't tried any nursing anything yet but I must admit they do look kind of complicated :-) And oh my gosh, you are so stinkin close to meeting your little man!!! I am quite jealous! I can't wait until I'm as far along as you! Keep us posted on how things are going!

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  3. OHHH EMMMM GEEEEE! Two days?! I am SO excited for you!!! I can't wait to see your precious boy and hear his name! SO excited for you! Will be thinking about you!!

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  4. I love your posts! You always make me laugh!

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  5. Hahaha. I actually only ever bought a nursing bra, and that was it. I wore regular tank tops and basically just pulled them down under my boob} tmi?

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  6. At least you were in the privacy of your own home! Try doing it in one of those teeny tiny fitting rooms. That was me on Monday. I got one arm through and was like "hell no" I'm not buying this thing!

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  7. I wish I would have "followed" your blog sooner! I love it. I just bought my first nursing bra a couple days ago (even though I've still got about 13 weeks to go). I know I'll get bigger, but I got one that allows me a little more room to grow anyway. I agree though...some of them are REALLY weird. I got a really basic one. I haven't looked at nursing tanks yet though...now I'm scared! Haha.


    You're almost there! Good luck with the birth and everything. I'm sure it won't be too much longer. By the way, you look AMAZING for being as far along as you are. You still have super tiny arms and legs. Lucky duck! I already see the fat just accumulating all over my body...and let me tell you...I'm not a fan.

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  8. I had really good luck with the Gilligan & O'Malley nursing tank tops and the simple kimono-ish cotton bras (for nighttime) at Target in the early days of nursing. Cheap (so you can get lots of them, because leakage/spitup occurs and they need to be washed pretty much daily), functional, not too ugly. Later on, I found some again cheap, simple ones at Motherhood Maternity - go for the no-underwire option, underwire gave me plugged ducts! Layered under normal tank tops work just fine. Best wishes as you meet your litte one!

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  9. MUahahha! I don't wear those kind...honestly, they freak me out. I do the regular old nursing tanks. You can get them at target for 8-12bucks I think! I also have two from old navy. Love those.

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  10. I was put off by the ones that have hole cut out. Just something about a hole for my nipple just wasn't appealing. I went for the ones that fold completely down. Half the time since I am at home I just wear a sports bra and pull it up. It does just the same!

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  11. That cracks me up! I saw a nursing nightgown at a lingerie store the other day and was like WTF, I have no idea how this works. And when I unclipped it was totally shocked to see the boob hole. Is that really necessary?!?!?

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  12. Everything about nursing freaks me out.....maybe you can post instructions on the tanks...they appear to be complicated! Good luck with everything..can't wait to see pics of the little fella..and hear the name you've chosen!

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  13. that reminds me all I have is a nursing bra (1) I think I need to get more... quickly

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  14. So close!! I'm so excited to see pics of your little man!

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  15. haha omg i'm cracking up at the thought... I wouldn't even know where to begin!

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  16. Those are the craziest getups! I'm sure they have a great purpose, but I would seriously have no idea how to put it on. Plus the sexiness factor is nil.

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  17. Great Post! New follower!
    http://julie-beingjulie.blogspot.com

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  18. hahahaha! this is exactly what happened to me!!

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  19. I hated nursing clothes too! Awful.

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  20. I totally agree as i am in the same position. I didnt really have any nursing gear coming out of the hospital and I am racing around now trying to figure that out. I am gonna blog my trial and error ways this week!

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