Monday, February 15, 2010

I Dreamed a Dream...


Early on, I told you all that this would not always be an "oooh, awww, how cute" pregnancy blog. Well, this is going to be one of those posts. The "un-oooh-awww" kind. We need to talk dreams. Assinine, crazy, "what-the-eff" pregnancy dreams. Mine started around week 8 and I haven't been able to shake them since. Let's recap a few of my favorites, shall we?!


First dream:

I stumble upon a sleeping lion in my backyard. He's slumped up against the corner of the fence and he's not just any lion. He's the gigantic lion from Narnia. I say to myself, "Hm, sleeping lions never hurt anyone! I want to pet him!" And as I reach my hand out to pet him, he wakes up, freaks out and begins to chase me around the neighborhood. COPS car-chase style. Over fences, through swimming pools (I know, I know. Pretty athletic for a pregnant lady) until I finally wake up. Random? Yes.


Second dream:

I'm perusing the goods at a local thriftstore. I come across a coin purse. It's made of tie-dyed fabric and has a beaded panda bear face on the front of it. I don't use a coin purse, but have recently found the need for one since my current bag as taken on a good 5-7 pounds in loose change weight. Intrigued to see how much said coin purse could hold, I open it. Much to my surprise, I find 400 dollars in it. What do I do? If you guessed pocket the money and purchase the purse, you're dead wrong. I insist on calling attention to my monetary find and refuse to take the money home, as "the money should really be donated to the thrift store." I actually said that to the cashier behind the desk. No joke.


Third dream:

Now, keep in mind, I never have dreams like this. I'm stranded on a tropical island. I'm wearing what looks like a shredded toga. I stumble upon what looks like an abandoned camp site. I practically trip over a sleeping Johnny Depp. And no, not any Johnny Depp. But Johnny Depp dressed as Captain Jack Sparrow. We speak no words, but commence immediately in a lovemaking marathon that would put any porn video to shame. Am I serious with myself? This man was dressed as a pirate. Hat and braids and pirate costume and all. I couldn't make this up if I tried.


I find it mildly hilarious that in none of these dreams am I pregnant. None of these dreams include a baby. These are just some crazy-ass dreams.

In other news, I have a slew of backdated posts that I need finish. Weekly "bumpdates," (or updates from the bump, rather) as well as a few other "funny things my husband says," posts. Hubs and I are currently knee-deep in house business and between that and work and baby-ness, I'm finding less and less time to blog. Not to mention that my job tried to block blogger. What a travesty! But that lack of blogging will all change soon! I promise! We'll be closing on our new house at the end of this month and could use all the good juju and prayers you could muster for us! They're greatly appreciated! Happy Monday!

9 comments :

  1. My preggo dreams are crazy too. They are either really violent (several have had men with guns trying to kill me) or really graphic and sexual. But I haven't had any crazy baby dreams yet.

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  2. I already have crazy dreams. Wonder what will happen when I am pregnant! Good luck on the house stuff! Looking forward to bumpdates!

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  3. lol! did you recently watch pirates of the carribbean? and waking up from chasing dreams is so exhausting.

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  4. That's cool that you remember your dreams though, I usually forget mine! xoe

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  5. I'm super late with this but congratulations!!! So happy for you. :) I love the dreams, especially the pirate affair--HA! Hope things continue to go well with you throughout your pregnancy! :)

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  6. I too have some crazy dreams already so that is rather worrying! Hate to think how they might get worse.
    Hope snow lessened for you or at least getting better xx

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  7. Sending you good thoughts and happy dreams! Good luck with the house closing!

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  8. haha! these are hilarious! I was literally laughing out loud at my desk about that Captain Jack one! That's awesome.

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  9. The dreams have probably been the most entertaining part of pregnancy to a certain degree! Mine are all along the Johnny Depp dream you had. Seriously, I've become a pre-pubescent boy in my head during these last 8 months!

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