Wake up, wake boys, brush your teeth. Brush their teeth, find socks, let them dress themselves (hallelujah!).
Toast Eggos, check homework folder, check calendar events. Make lunch, pack lunch, change diapers. Laugh at yourself when, two weeks ago, you thought making lunches was the best thing EV-AR.
Remind everyone to go potty and reward with sugar (even at 8am, multiple times).
Check the homework folder again, just in case, tie shoes, load car. Drive 35 minutes to school, sit in car line, hug goodbye. Cringe when you remember you forgot to vacuum the backseat and you know the car line door opener is TOTALLY JUDGING YOU.
Fill the following three hours with story time, library time, gymboree time, craft time. Try to remember the last time you didn't feel utterly exhausted. Remember a deadline, try to write. Want to write real stuff, deadlines loom. Baby wants to nap (nooo!!). Pick-up is in less than an hour. Make more lunches, feed small humans.
Congratulate yourself on successfully potty training a human being for the second time. Remember how much it sucks having to be within thirty seconds of a bathroom ALWAYS. Reward potty success with sugar. Load everyone into the car.
Roll through Starbucks (iced Skinny Vanilla Latte with 1 pump Pumpkin) and cake pops all around. Realize you're never losing the last of the baby weight. Arrive to school forty minutes early. Baby is sleeping (halleluiah!). Catch up on emails, keep the car running.
Middle little plays on the playground. Chase middle little up and down the slide 497 times. Maybe lose some baby weight after all. Chat with other Moms. Can't believe you're such an adult. Contemplate volunteering as Room Mom. Pick up biggest little. Hugs all around.
Narrowly miss catching your 3 year old drop-trou right in the middle of the playground. Re-direct him to the emergency Gatorade bottle in your car. Close one, Mom.
Return home. Prep dinner. Fold laundry. Neglect to put it away. Again. Break up 47 MMA-style wrestling matches. Try to watch Ladies of London. Middle little screams for Paw Patrol. Give in. Twice.
Give up. Head to playroom. Make a mess. Clean it up. Cook dinner, feed kids, Daddy's home. Family walk, everyone in the bath, collapse on the couch with an adult root beer. Forget what quiet sounds like.
Sit with husband. Sync calendars (how romantic), try not to cry when he gives you his travel schedule. Remember you have Jury Duty next week. Cry.
Watch a movie, fold more laundry. Kiss sweaty, sleeping foreheads, head upstairs to bed.
Fall asleep. Suddenly remember tomorrow is Crazy Sock Day. Wake up in a panic. Pad downstairs to check backpacks, assemble lunches, check homework folders.
Baby, who isn't really a baby anymore, wakes like clockwork for 1am nursing session. Remind yourself this is just a SEASON. Try to remember what life was like before #ThatMomLife set in.
Laugh when you realize these are the best (exhausted) years of your life.