Thursday, May 20, 2010

Marital Musings: On Pregnancy. Don't Say You Weren't Warned!

While standing in the kitchen (albeit barefoot and pregnant) preparing dinner one night:

AP: [looks down at feet] Wow. I really can't see my toes. That's weird.
Hubs: [not super interested in the conversation, but lets out a half-laugh]

AP: Hm. [dejected sigh] You know what else I haven't seen in a while? My hoo-ha.
Hubs: [lights up at the mention of hoo-ha] Um HI!!!!! Join the club!!! Me either.

Anyone's boyfriend/fiance/husband ever try to tell them that their member would fall off if it didn't get any use? You know, this line was often mega popular back in those high school days? Well ladies, they were all lies. Don't believe them for a minute! ;)

"They" say that your sex drive roller coasters throughout pregnancy- some women become ravenous tigresses, some women refuse to be touched with a ten foot pole. I would just like to take a minute to thank Hubs for being such a great sport about the whole thing. Babe, I promise I'll make it up to you...


Sidenote: I can't believe I just said the word "hoo-ha" on my blog. Dad, Nanny.. I'm really, really sorry. Haha!


  1. I am in the same boat. My sex drive went to shit when i got preggo, it's the last thing on my mind. I am going to need to make it up to my hubby after the baby.

    PS, I can still see my woo ha but soon it will disappear!!

  2. HILARIOUS!! I love it! Thanks for your honesty, it's so fun and refreshing.

  3. FYI... this has completely turned my day around. It started as a complete sh*tshow, and now you have me laughing in my seat. :)

    I would have to agree with you on all accounts here... you're cracking me the hell up.

    thank you sweetest pea.

    p.s. i wish we could go get pedicures together... then we COULD see our toes... at least for the hour. ;)

  4. You crack me up. I haven't seen my va-jay jay in some time either. My husband offered to help me do some...maintenance...I quiver in fear. Not sure which is scarier...swimsuit season or my husband near my hoo ha with a razor.

    As for the sex drive thing...I envy the pregnant women who have one. Mine has been nonexistent pretty much since the moment I found out I was pregnant. I pray it comes back after baby!

  5. H ah ha ha! I am right there with you! Although, with husband working and going to school at the same time, he's more tired than I am most nights. So, its ME thats left hanging.

  6. I have a pregnant friend right now and she too talked about the ups and downs. She finally caved to appease him and threw up right after sex. Bet that taught him a lesson.

  7. This made me laugh because we are SO in the EXACT same boat. My sex drive= non-existant. Seriously, the minute I peed on that stick, I wanted nothing to do with sex.

    I'll have to tell my husband about this post, he would laugh & be relieved to know that he's not the only deprived husband in the world ;)

  8. Hilarious!! Oh the things I have to look forward to!

  9. This cracked me up! My drive was raging during my 2nd trimester then tanked once I hit the 3rd and still hasn't found it's way back to me... Can't believe I just said that!

  10. so, so funny. i almost spit out my coffee

  11. Wait until your baby drops into the pelvis and swells the hoo-ha and general area. Even more fun things to look forward to!


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