This is a sponsored post written on behalf of #MinuteMaid and Socialstars to remind parents everywhere that they’re #doingood too.
If someone stopped you on the street tomorrow and asked you how you think you’re doing as a parent, how would you respond?
If I had to base my answer on how the events of today developed, my answer would be “not so hot” and then I’d probably cry a little. In fact, just moments before sitting down to write this I flopped down on the couch next to my husband, exasperated and with my head on his shoulder muttered, “if progress reports were handed out for Mothering today I’d undoubtedly get a C- with a resounding ‘needs work.’”
Chances are you’ve felt the same way too. If not about today’s events then perhaps one day next week or maybe it was one day last week that had you on your knees totally questioning your capabilities as the mother of tiny humans.
I’ll be the first to admit that I have moments like that all the time. Most recently right after I found my middle child spraying shaving cream all over the dresser in his bedroom. That was right before I caught my littlest stirring the water in the dog’s bowl with my brand new make-up brush. Oh and did I mention that my oldest started using the phrase “you’re the meanest mom in the WORLD” that morning?
It’s in those moments that I reach out to my nearest and dearests, my partners in the trenches of Motherhood, for support. Within seconds we’re trading stories in what might seem like a reality episode of My Kid Is Crazier than Yours but the truth of the matter is, we all think we’re failing at this Mom Gig.
As mothers of tiny humans it’s so easy to be hard on ourselves. I blame it on the lack of measurable goals and scarcity of recognition for our victories both big and small. I see it in myself and in my husband. In my girlfriends and looking back, my own mother.
Do you know what the best part of all is? I look up to my girlfriends and my own mother so much, drawing from them my own strength as a mother and here they are thinking they’re failing! If there’s one thing I want my girlfriends and my mom to know is that never once have I ever focused on their self-imposed shortcomings. The truth is that I think they are some of the greatest mothers I’ve ever had the privilege of knowing. That is why I make sure to tell them at every moment I can that they’re #doingood even in, especially in, the moments when they think anything but.
With the holidays in full swing, it’s even easier to feel like The Worst Parent in the World, to lose sight of the big picture. Maybe you didn’t have time to move the elf last night or you just can’t get it together in time to whip up a Pinterest-worthy teacher’s gift. Worse even, maybe there isn’t enough money in the bank this year to buy a child the number one gift on their list, much less one of the gifts that’s topping ALL the blogger gift lists this year. Or maybe their Holiday Pageant is in the middle of a work day and there’s no way your boss will give you time off so close to year’s end.
If you’re feeling anything described above, I want you to know that my heart is aching for you. It aches that you feel as if you can’t give your child 100% of you all of the time. It aches that you feel defeated and disappointed in yourself. I want you to know, despite how you may feel, you are doing good too and if you were to ask one of your kids how they think you’re doing as a parent, chances are they’d feel the same way too.
It’s not about the presents or the money spent. It’s not about doing it all, the perfectly staged Christmas card or the award winning Christmas cookies. Bad days happen and I can guarantee that there are many, many more days ahead that will have us parents questioning our abilities and fearing just how much therapy our kids might need later in life.
What matters most is trying our damnedest to raise happy, loved, well-adjusted kids and not without losing sight of the joy and fun along the way.
Chances are you know a parent who could use a hug, a pat on the back and a “you’re doing good, too.” This holiday season, I challenge you to go out and tell at least five other parents that they’re #doingood too, despite how they may feel otherwise.
We’re all in this together!
You don't even know how much I needed to read/hear this today. Thank you! I love your blog.
ReplyDeletebeautifully written and so true!
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